The halfway point (week 6, Day 5)

My Biggest Loser group has finally reached the halfway point! I think that is a big accomplishment in itself, regardless of my limited weight loss. I've showed up, Monday-Friday, @ 5:28 am for 28 of the 30 days (two days were vacation -- but I did still exercise) and put in a good 55 minute effort. I've worked out at least one more time on almost all of those days, plus the weekends. I do not enjoy it anymore today, on day 30, then I did on day 1, and I'm even a bit discouraged because I am so far from my weight-loss goal (perhaps I was unrealistic in thinking I could lose 36 pounds in 12 weeks?). On the other hand, I now have biceps! Who'd have thought that was possible? And, I've lost inches--my whole group has. We'll see how many on Monday.

My trainer Corey and I are definitely not on the same wave length. His suggestions (for life outside the gym) do not fit my lifestyle and I get tired of the EXTREME world view he espouses. Religion issues aside, I don't think all his ideas about food are bad or wrong, but they are unrealistic and unsustainable in the long-term for me--an extremely busy working mom, wife, pet owner and community volunteer who LOVES FOOD. I am not going to follow his eating plan and thus will not achieve the results that may be possible if I did (I am following the nutritionist's/dietitian's advice, though). I've accepted that. I'm not sure HE'S accepted that, though. And despite what he told me, yes, I AM happy when I eat a delicious cheeseburger. I am not just fooling myself. For anyone who hasn't read Eat, Pray, Love -- read it. I am the "Eat" chapter. I LOVE and APPRECIATE good food, especially that which is prepared by others for me. I think there is a difference between stress and boredom eating and general over-eating of processed food (which I have been a master at doing in the past) and eating and enjoying food for more than the nutrition it provides, including the TASTE, the SMELL, the TEXTURE, and yes, the SOCIAL aspect. I believe that food and eating have an important cultural purpose as well.

However, he is a good trainer inside the gym and I think that while I would prefer the training style and exercises of the other trainer, the heavy emphasis on whole body workouts and strength training has probably been the correct approach for me given how weak I am and my disinclination to do it on my own. I'll take a walk, or do an elliptical machine on my own; frankly, there is no way I'd ever pick up a medicine ball or kettle ball or do a push-up without someone telling me I had to. I do appreciate that he has listened to my concerns about the weights being TOO HEAVY and the past couple weeks he has adapted my weight levels downward even though the other ladies are doing heavier weights. Despite my new biceps, I am weak, what can I say?

So, overall, even though I, once again, will not meet my goal, I am happy with the program. It got me off my lazy butt. I've proved I CAN get up at 5:00 am and workout, if that is the only time in my life where I can gain an hour to exercise. I'm no more tired than I was getting up @ 6:00, so I guess that means I actually am less tired. I CAN eat less and more healthy food and not starve to death or feel completely deprived. I CAN do more than I thought I could and I DO push myself more than I would on my own. I HAVE met some awesome people. I LOVE the gym and its staff, Hybrid Fitness , and think it is a model operation, with the combined focus of whole body group exercise, personal training and nutrition (they even have a healthy restaurant on site, which I would love to take the meal plan, but can't afford it :-()

The next twelve weeks start in June. . .by then we will have a dog, which I have been given the responsibility of walking in the morning. I will have to decide if I should continue this program or not and if I can fit it in with the dog walking. I think some of my group are signing up again. I don't want to slide backwards. . . but I was going to take my Diet Coke money (after the first 12 weeks) and save for a trip to Hawaii!