The Smallest Biggest Loser :-)

Last Friday I finished my 12 week Biggest Loser program. I told you I wasn't a quitter! Suffice it to say, I was NOT the Biggest Loser. In fact, I may have been the Smallest Loser since they started the progam! I have no idea what my final numbers are because I don't have my starting numbers, except for my weight. I could get them, but in the big scheme of things, they don't really matter. Suffice it to say, I lost more than 10 pounds, less than 20. I lost more inches than weight. By comparison, a woman in my latest group has lost 11 pounds in 2 weeks (and no, she is not hugely obese). I suck :-)

I have no one to blame for being the "smallest loser" except myself. While I dutifully showed up every morning (except 2) and completed my hour of exercise, I did not dutifully get my extra hour in every day and I did not restrict my diet as much as I should have. I was much more diligent at the beginning of the program than at the end, but after 6 weeks of 2-a-days and following the diet plan and pretty minimal weight-loss results (did better on the inches), I kind of slacked off. For example, that coffee cake I ate at work yesterday and the General Tso's Chinese food I ate last night. . .definitely not on the nutrition plan. My homemade salad I had at lunch (spinach, mixed greens, grilled chicken, strawberries, blueberries, and feta cheese)-- now that was a good effort! My eating, while definitely not perfect and probably still a nutritionist's nightmare, is much better than it was, though. I am eating better breakfasts, many more fruits and veggies, and more lean protein. I am snacking less (but still some) on empty carb and sugar loaded treats. I haven't had pizza in weeks. I'm still a boredom eater though. I need to focus more on controlling that.

That said, I am still completely happy I did the program as my birthday present to myself and very happy with the results!! It was great overall, despite my daily struggles with the exercises and my trainer for the first 11 1/2 weeks. I am much stronger and more fit than I was when I started, despite not meeting my weight-loss goal. Today, I did tons of pushups and crunchy type things with a medicine ball without even being that tired at the end. Who would've thought I would be able to do 20+ pushups in a row? Not me! I even ran up and down a very big hill today -- IN THE RAIN -- and survived. I have dropped 2 clothing sizes, which is pretty good considering the minimal weight-loss. I successfully lost all the weight I had gained back (after Weight Watchers) when my dad and grandma were sick late last year. During that time I was stress-eating constantly. Heck, I even overate the disgusting Thanksgiving dinner they served at the hospital! Note to dad and grandma (and everyone else I love and care about) -- STAY HEALTHY!!! My health apparently depends on your health :-)

I also learned that "not having time" for exercise is just an excuse. Getting up @ 5 am (and then @ 4:25 am) sucked. I complained about it every day. But, it certainly was possible, and I wasn't any MORE tired than I was when I just stayed in bed. This morning I was so energized after the workout I was in disbelief when I looked at the clock in the car and it read 6:15. Seriously, 12 weeks ago I wouldn't have even been out of bed @ 6:15, and I would have been exhausted all day. And there are other ways to get exercise in, too. I walk the hill @ work at lunch. Women on my floor walk laps around the floor on their breaks. I walk to soccer games. I can run around the backyard with Matthew instead of sitting in front of the computer surfing my boards (which I love to do). There is time for exercise, it's just a matter of committing to it.

What's next for me? I have no idea at this point. There are so many ideas going through my head. I still have about 25 pounds to lose to get to my goal weight, which would put me in the upper range of a "normal" BMI for my height (but still nowhere near my lowest weight -- which I attained when I was 27 years old). I shed the obese label, but I don't want to be "overweight" either -- I want to be healthy. I have morning dog walking (or possibly running) duty in my future, but in reality, that is not enough exercise to burn the type of calories that I need to burn. There are morning bootcamp options in McFarland, and there are morning group exercise classes in fitness centers near and far. I could also just hie thee to the nearest fitness center and continue on my own. However, I think I've proven over the last 7 years that I am not motivated enough and do not push myself hard enough to do this on my own. I really like the group aspect. To be perfectly honest, the program costing major money was also a huge motivator. Not going to a fitness center that is costing $30/month is pretty easy to do. Not attending a fitness program costing hundreds of dollars a month is much harder; this program cost real money. Lots of options and choices on the exercise front and I'll make a decision soon.

As for the eating. . .well, I need to get back on the good eating bandwagon. That would be a lot easier if I like vegetables and enjoyed cooking. I was pretty successful at Weight Watchers when I did it (fell off the wagon when my dad got hurt), and maybe I should just start-up again. It has the weekly accountability factor that the Biggest Loser program did, and it offers a lot of positive reinforcement, which I have determined I really need. Sometimes I need praise for not making the worst possible choice, even if I could have made a better choice.

Finally (after all of this) a shout out to some special people who helped get me through all this with their support.

To Jim and Matthew -- I love you both more than anything and thank you for giving me 12 weeks where I was long gone before you even got up. Those morning phone calls perked me up when I'd arrive at work exhausted and (sometimes) mad. Matthew, if being a fish biologist doesn't work out for you when you are older, you could always be a trainer. Sometimes you were harder on me than Corey!

To Jenny and Amy, and the other Biggest Loser participants: Thank you for your support and for letting me join your group at the end! My final three days were my favorite three days. You guys ROCK!!!! You know how hard this is and your success and dedication is so motivating and inspirational. Keep it up. Attain your goals. Keep Ryan in check. Don't be me :-)

To all my other friends who have followed my journey: THANK YOU for your positive feedback and support. When I wasn't getting the positive reinforcement I needed from my trainer, I could always count on you guys to give me a push, nudge me forward, encourage me to keep going. Some of you I see daily and some I haven't seen in 20 years. Some of you are in great shape and have never struggled with your weight. Some of you have always struggled with your weight. And, some of you are like me. . .former athletes, formerly in good shape, who couldn't keep it all together with kids, a full-time job, volunteer work and all the other responsibilities of modern life. I appreciate ALL of your support more than you can possibly ever know.